if you are really in there (there is a part of me that thinks you might not be real) i want you to know how much i want you.
Yesterday was a shock. You are very much wanted, but came a little sooner than we thought possible. It seems all of our friends are trying so hard to have babies and can’t or aren’t having good luck so there is a part of us that cannot believe that only 2 months after deciding we would want you when we were lucky enough to have you that you might really be in there.
I told your Daddy about you at 5:23. He walked into my office and I started crying. They were happy tears, but also scared and shock and a little bit of fear that he would be mad at me or not ready for you.
His whole face lit up into the brightest smile in the world. I should never have doubted him, he’s the most wonderful man in the world, but we really have no idea what we are in for.
He sat down and i couldn’t tell if that smile was happy or scared shitless…probably both.
It was a night we would never forget. We were on our way to a Kenny Chesney concert. I craved McDonalds, your Daddy was freaking out. I mean, within the past 3 months we have moved into a new house, i have a new job, daddy is interviewing for one, wedding and honeymoon and now you, little miracle baby. We are more than blessed with all of the love and joy that we have.
This has all just happened so fast. Yesterday I took the pregnancy test and we had only been home from our honeymoon ONE WEEK….I am literally 3 weeks pregnant.
Daddy and I went to the doctor this morning for a confirmation on you and, sure enough, she walked into our Exam Room with a “Pretty Positive” answer.
I cried again and then we called my mom who screamed. She is already so in love with you. As am I. And Daddy.
Daddy got drunk last night to process the thought of you. I drove us home, of course….he cried the whole way home and kept saying we needed to have a Board Meeting to talk about what’s next and how we need to prepare for you.
Little Love, I love you so much! I only know what it feels like at this point to love niece and nephews, but I am preparing myself to feel a love greater than words. If I can love anything more than I love your dad, I am prepared to rip my own heart out for you.
The train has left and now we just get on board and enjoy the ride!